Soft Ethics for a Loud World Chp I


Soft Ethics for a Loud World

1. If someone is saying “I’m sorry,” accept it with grace. Don’t argue who’s right. Sometimes peace is holier than proof.

2. If someone is standing before you, acknowledge them, especially if they are younger. Respect doesn’t need an audience, only a gesture.

3. If someone is saying they need advice, give it with sincerity, but don’t bind them to it. Guidance is not control.

4. If someone is saying they find joy in something, let your heart respond with a quiet prayer. Not every emotion needs a comment.

5. If someone says they got a job, say “Mubarak ho.” Please don’t ask how much they’re earning or who helped them. Their joy is not your inquiry.

6. If someone is saying it’s their birthday, celebrate. Don’t chase their age with questions. Let joy be unmeasured.

7. If someone is saying they are preparing for an exam, say a prayer, don’t wait to critique their result.

8. If someone is saying they’re happy, pray it lasts. Don’t dissect it with doubts.

9. If someone is saying something private, seal it in silence. If Allah veils them, who are you to unveil?

10. If someone is saying they’re getting married or in a relationship, listen only as much as they wish to share. Don’t pry into their in-laws or plans. Respect their boundaries, not just their bond.

11. If someone is saying less, don’t push for more. People open when they feel safe, not when pressured.

12. If someone is showing their weakness, remember your own. Yours may just be better hidden.

13. If someone is saying they are struggling, don’t interrupt with your story. Sometimes, all they need is to be heard.

14. If someone is saying something about their life, don’t compare it with yours. Your story wasn’t meant to match theirs.

15. If someone is joking with you, don’t let your laughter belittle them. Some wounds are deep beneath smiles.

16. If someone once said something in trust, honor it forever, even after they leave.

17. If someone is silent after a misunderstanding, don’t wait in pride. Speak. Hearts respond to voices, not assumptions.

18. If someone says “thank you,” receive it. And if they’re not, say it for them. Gratitude is not owed, it’s chosen.

19. If someone is saying they’re fine but you sense pain, don’t press. Be gentle. Everyone’s storm sounds different.

20. If someone is saying they feel broken, don’t correct them then and there, just sit with them. Presence is the softest healer.

21. If someone is confronting you personally, don’t weaponize your title. Power is never for revenge.

22. If someone is saying something in silence, protect it. You’re not being tested to expose, but to hold space.

23. If someone is wearing something beautiful, don’t say, “Nice dress.” Say, “It looks beautiful on you,” or “You carry it with such grace.” Let your compliment touch the person, not just the object.

24. If someone is grieving and says nothing at all, be there anyway. Grief doesn’t need a timeline, only presence.

25. If someone says they were hurt by your words, don’t justify. Apologize sincerely, humbly.

26. If someone is saying they’re inviting you to their joy, go if you can. Even a cup of tea shared is a gesture of belonging.

27. If someone is sitting in a group with you, don’t isolate them by private whispers. Inclusion is silent respect.

28. If someone is at the table with you, let your manners speak. Don’t disturb the blessing with noise or fuss.

29. If someone is sad or withdrawn, don’t investigate in front of others. And if something offends you, resolve it privately. Not all pain belongs in public ears.

30. If someone is saying they need help, help them kindly. Don’t throw your knowledge upon them. Correct with care, not condescension. Help is a service, not a show.

31. If someone is calling or telling you about their marriage and relationship, listen to the extent they want to tell you, don’t dig into their in-laws and love life.

32. If someone is trusting you with their silence or struggle, honor that. You’re not being tested to expose them. You’re being trusted to hold space.


(To be Continued) 

 


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